January 22, 2014

Personal Responsibility In Our Children

I've been thinking more and more recently about my children being "self-sufficient" & "personally responsible" adults in life. Scary, I know, considering Alyssa is 18 yrs old and I probably should have been thinking about this much earlier than now. But, alas, I haven't!
 

 
A series of events have lead to this post, the most recent being yesterday:

While I was working Alyssa (my oldest daughter) text me from school saying that she was hungry. "OK?" I thought. I respond "I'm working". She then proceeds to whine *yes, I could hear the whine through the text* about how she had been up since 6:00am, forgot her lunch, it was now 4:00pm and she wouldn't be done with practice until 7:30pm and she was *starving*.
 
My first thought was that of frustration. I mean seriously?!?! Is she for real? Did she really go ALL DAY without eating anything and now expects to have the energy to practice {colorguard}.... oh AND expects ME to stop working to bring it to her?
 
{I know the following should have been my first thought, but it wasn't, so sue me!}
My second thought was concern; after all, she IS a diabetic. Going all day without eating isn't good for anyone, but it especially isn't good for a diabetic. The horror of a low blood sugar then comes to mind.
 
But, I think the biggest thought was "Where is your personal responsibility?" and I responded as such! {I am a serious contender for mother of the year right now} "You should have planned ahead and packed your lunch and some snacks. You are 18, Alyssa! What are you going to do when you are on a college campus next year and you don't have mom to run something to you?" Her response you ask? "I dunno!"
 
Agghhhhh!!!!! I HAVE CREATED A LITTLE MONSTER! Now I do have to say, Alyssa is GENERALLY a pretty responsible & mature kid. She is actively involved with school, church, and her community. She maintains good grades, is Captain of the Rifle team for colorguard, coaches cheerleading, works with special needs children, helps me with her siblings, etc., etc. etc. She has been an active participant and day to day giver of her medical care for the past 10 years. But all of the sudden a light bulb went off for me......
 
So much of her "responsibility" is because MOM keeps her on schedule and gives her reminders. *oh, snap* Is she really going to be a self-sufficient adult? Is she going to "survive" without mom there to keep her on track? Well, duh, I KNOW she will... but could I have prepared her better? I still have 7 months before she leaves for college. It's crunch time!!
 
What about you? How have you prepared your children to leave the nest and fly on their own? HELP!









Linked To:
Raising Arrows, Easy Life, Losing My Gut, Turnips 2 Tangerines, Scrumptilicious 4 You, From My Front Porch to Yours, Sweet Haute

1 comment:

  1. I have a 29 year old daughter who used to expect the same things from me and she grew up to be extremely responsible and self-sufficient. But she still loves to be spoiled by me so I get texts like "I am home sick and I really need muffins - can you make me some"? Of course, I make them because I know she will always be my spoiled little girl! Really enjoyed reading your post. Thanks for sharing on the Four Season party.

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